15 Years

Photo by Angela

Mike and I are celebrating our 15th anniversary today. It’s hard to believe we’ve been married that long. It doesn’t seem that long to me. I’ve been thinking back through the years of our marriage with fond memories. It’s been a fulfilling 15 years together. We’ve been through many things, happy and sad, and learned much about each other and about marriage in general.

To celebrate today I’ve made a list of 15 things (not comprehensive, and in no particular order) that I think make our marriage work. As you read through the list I think you will notice a trend. Mike is a BIG reason this marriage works. I’m a very lucky women…

1- After being with Mike almost everyday of my life for over 15 years I’ve never once gotten tired of being around him. When we aren’t together I always feel a little ‘off.’

2- Fighting between us is rare, but when we do fight it’s usually rough and usually because I started it. Mike doesn’t like contention much so he doesn’t tend to pick fights, but he is willing to work through things with me, even when I’m being confrontational.

3- Mike and I have very little in common when it comes to hobbies and recreational activities (aside from jet skiing and loving the same types of music). That said…we are both willing to join in each other’s interests from time to time in the spirit of being supportive.

4- I’m married to a man who is not demanding in the least. Mike is so undemanding in fact, that I often have to consciously remind myself to make sure his needs are met; which I think I do pretty well (for the most part).

5- We are both highly invested in the upbringing and well-being of our children. We share the tasks of parenting fairly equally, and are, for the most part, on the same page when it comes to the kids. Mike is a very good father. He is a great role model for the boys and he has a super soft spot for Mary Kate, which I find endearing. Mike is very supportive of me as a mother.

6- We are both equally fond of our dog (which makes things easier for a plethora of reasons).

7- When all is said and done we ultimately want the same things out of this earthly existence and are both aiming for the same things in the life to come. This is, in my opinion, the most important factor when it comes to our marriage working well.

8- We totally get each other’s senses of humor (as unsophisticated as they may be). Mike makes me laugh. I make him laugh. We often make each other laugh in the midst of stress and contention. It goes without saying that this can be extremely beneficial at certain times (see #2).

9- Our strengths are different, but nicely compatible. 

10- We trust each other. Enough said.

11- Mike makes me feel lovable when I don’t feel loveable. This is one of my favorite things about him. I can, at times, be very hard on myself. Mike is not hard on me AT ALL. If anything, he errs on the side of thinking too well of me. He is always my soft place to fall when I’ve put myself through a long day of self-deprecation.

12- Mike is helpful. He doesn’t always see what needs to be done, but he is always willing to do whatever I request: such as cleaning bathrooms, scooping dog poop, and mopping the kitchen floor. He cheerfully does things that I hate to do.

13- I think Mike is super handsome. He still melts my butter.

14- Mike has seen me at the lowest and most vulnerable times in my life, and, according to him, it’s those times that help him love me even more. (Thank goodness…because I always worry it will be the opposite).

15- Our marriage is far from perfect. We experience the same struggles and difficulties that are common to most people who are trying to make a life together, but despite it all we really, truly love and respect each other. That’s the truth.

Like I said, this is not a comprehensive list, and these things are from my perspective only. I’m sure Mike’s list would include some different things. (Gee…I hope he has a list!)

Did you see the trend though? Mike is most certainly a huge part of why this marriage works. I feel so blessed to have him in my life. It’s been an amazing 15 years and I’m looking forward to another 15 and many, many years beyond. I can’t imagine my life without Michael. I wouldn’t even try.

Happy Anniversary babe! Thanks for being the kind of man you can make a good list about.