Saying Goodbye…For Now

I was so grateful when Belinda’s sister-in-law called and asked me (along with two other close friends) to help prepare the display table for the funeral. I was immensely grateful to have a worthy occupation during those few days after Belinda’s passing. As you can see, we didn’t go with a less-is-more approach. Belinda wouldn’t have wanted that; she was indeed a more-is-more kind of gal. We went with more-is-more, and I think we successfully created something Belinda would have been thrilled with. In fact, we were joking that we could hear her voice, ringing with superlatives about all the frilly, all the shiny, and all the periwinkle—her favorite color.

One thing Belinda could never be accused of is having her priorities mixed up. We wanted the display to reflect what was most important to Belinda. God—>family—> service to others.

Along with “The Living Christ” (which Belinda recited to herself every morning), we included in the display, a scripture that we felt was perfect…

Doctrine and Covenants 101:14-16, 36-38

“And all they who have mourned shall be comforted. And all they who have given their lives for my name shall be crowned. Therefore, let your hearts be comforted concerning Zion; for all flesh is in mine hands; be still and know that I am God.

“Wherefore, fear not even unto death; for in this world your joy is not full, but in me your joy is full. Therefore, care not for the body, neither the life of the body; but care for the soul, and for the life of the soul. And seek the face of the Lord always, that in patience ye may possess your souls, and ye shall have eternal life.”

Belinda most certainly cared most for things of the soul.

As for the funeral service…I don’t know that I have been to a more powerful meeting. The only other meetings that I feel are equal would be the funerals of my grandparents and my aunt Leah. Funerals tend to be that way. By nature they cause you to feel deeply the things that are really most important in life. The spirit is powerful at funerals.

There was certainly sadness, but mostly I felt a feeling of peace. For me personally, I felt mostly overwhelming gratitude. I felt so blessed that I had the privilege of knowing Belinda, for having her as friend. She was a gift in my life.

There is a reason that a certain hymn is often sung at funerals. The words of the hymn say it perfectly. I especially love verse two…

What greater gift dost thou bestow,
What greater goodness can we know
Than Christ-like friends, whose gentle ways
Strengthen our faith, enrich our days.

These are perfect words. That’s exactly how I felt about Belinda.

Gerber daisies were Belinda’s favorite flower. As her friends, we made sure that there were plenty of them.

Belinda’s son Joshua (11 years old) was so sweet through it all. He’s been in possession of his mom’s cell phone since the day she entered the hospital. (When he called me using her phone, the first day after her passing, I was caught off guard and my heart nearly stopped. I’m so used to seeing “Belinda Craft” on my caller ID and answering enthusiastically).

During the viewing Joshua showed as many people as possible his favorite picture of he and his mom on that phone. He’s hanging on to that device quite tightly. Here he is showing the Hammond girl’s his favorite picture…

This is Belinda’s dear friend Stacey (along with Angela, Belinda’s daughter). Stacey has been close friends with Belinda for many years. Stacey’s time left on this earth is short (after a year long, very courageous battle with cancer, she is now on hospice). Although Stacey was of course deeply sad for the loved ones Belinda has left behind, she was certainly the happiest person at the funeral. No doubt Belinda will be waiting for Stacey with open arms when she arrives. The two of them will do great things together up there. I know it’s not coincidence that they are leaving this life together.

Belinda, Shawna and I were a solid set of three. I’m so glad Shawna is still here with me. I’m so glad she’s been with me through this experience. Love you Shawna!

And this man. He has shown me so much empathy and love through this whole ordeal. He loved Belinda too and appreciated what she brought to my life, to our life.

I think about Belinda all the time. I miss her terribly. She left a hole that can’t really be filled by anyone else. I have felt strengthened though, by so many kind people (thank you), by Belinda’s amazing family, and by the spirit. I’m praying for her family constantly. I can only imagine what they must be feeling as they contemplate the long road ahead of them as the continue forward without her.

They can do it though. They have Belinda’s example to help show them the way, and that’s some incredible example.